So the boss may say to the team member, “It’s not my decision to make. I’m just telling you what my boss told me. It’s out of my hands. It’s just our policy.” Or to his or her manager, “I just have a bunch of poor performers. Turnover’s too high. We just had a layoff. I don’t get the support I need from upper management.” We have all heard the excuses. We have all used them at times. Being responsible can sometimes be hard. In 1964, a woman was repeatedly stabbed, raped and, finally, murdered. The actions occurred over a 35 minute period of time and there were 38 witnesses. No one did anything to help. No one, it seemed, was responsible for helping, or even for notifying the police. People were outraged. They said, “I certainly wouldn’t act that way. Surely, I would have done something”[1].
This incident triggered a series of experiments on people’s willingness to assume responsibility. The researchers wanted to find out if, indeed, this was an isolated incident, or if there was some phenomenon that inhibits taking responsibility in certain situations. One such experiment isolated subjects in separate rooms where they could hear other subjects but not see them[2]. One “subject” was a confederate who simulated a seizure. The experimenter then noted how many subjects would come to his aid. If the subject believed that he or she was the only other person to hear the confederate’s cry for help, he/she would act. But, if there were multiple subjects, very few would act. About two thirds of the subjects did nothing. Was it apathy? Probably not, concluded the experimenters. Just as those witnessing the crime, most people in the experiment reported great anxiety during the incident and remorse afterward. It seems there are powerful forces acting to restrain people from stepping out, especially in a group.
Following the explosion of the Challenger Shuttle and the subsequent investigation, engineers at Morton Thiokol, the maker of the faulty O-rings responsible for the failure, described their attempts to explain the problem to their managers. On of the primary engineers, after outlining the technical problems with the O-rings, said, “I must emphasize, I had my say, and I never (would) take (away) any management right to take the input of an engineer and then make a decision based upon that input, and I truly believe that. So there was no point in me doing anything any further than I had already attempted to do. I left the room feeling badly defeated, but I felt I really did all I could to stop the launch.” It is easy to be critical of this engineer’s decision to give up. He could have gone over his manager’s head, gone directly to NASA, or to some other government agency. He could have done something! But, in all honesty, how many of us would have taken those extra steps? How many of us would have tried to help the guy having the seizure in the experiment? How many of us would have done something to help the victim of that horrible crime in 1964?
Taking Responsibility in Your Life
At home, how many of us have been reluctant to speak up when we have a conflict with a loved one? Sometimes we don’t want to be the first to speak. Or, we fear it will give the other some sort of psychological or emotional advantage. Or, we are afraid we will hurt their feelings, etc. How often have we been loathe to listen to our spouse or child when we know they are trying to tell us something that may make us uncomfortable?
At work, how many times have we decided to “let something go” because we don’t want to get involved, are afraid we will be labeled as a “whiner,” or because we believe it would be futile to say anything. I recently completed an assignment with a team at a chemical processing plant. This team’s job was to unload ships. They had to know how to operate large, complex machines. It is a job that requires considerable skill. All of the operators and supervisors had been carefully selected and thoroughly trained in the technical components of their tasks. There were 32 operators in the group attending the team building portion of their training. The number of operators had been agreed upon by the managers, the union, and the operators several months before the training. What I discovered during the session was that the managers were considering lowering the number of workers to 24 instead of the agreed upon 32. Their figures indicated that the job could be done with fewer employees.
During the entire workshop, the participants were grumbling about the decision. “Typical management shortsightedness. They don’t care about us. They don’t understand what it really takes to do the job. Some number cruncher is trying to run our department,…” etc. The facilitator (ever the optimist) I asked them, “Have you talked to them about it?” They all responded in much the same way, “What good would it do? They’ve already made up their minds.” One segment of the team building session was a simulation in which teams constructed a system of pumps and valves. The task had a number of challenges and obstacles built in. As a part of the simulation, the teams were encouraged to “negotiate” for things they needed to be successful. Some teams did this and others did not. Those that asked for help were far more successful than those who did not ask. During the final debriefing, one of the team members suggested that what they learned during the simulation might actually be applied to their real situation at work. (What a concept!)
So, they did some research, determined how much time it would really take to unload each ship. It required a number of steps that are not an official part of the job description. They put their findings into a report and presented it to their managers. Much to their surprise, the managers agreed with their analysis and decided to stick with the original agreement of 32 operators. The managers said, “We didn’t realize how much really went into unloading a ship. We need to revise our estimates. Thank you for calling this to our attention.” I’m not saying that this happens all the time. But, I have seen hundreds of situations where taking responsibility for speaking up might have made a difference. Sadly, most of the time, teams won’t do this. There are a number of difficult emotional barriers to overcome when faced with these kinds of decisions.
Taking responsibility for confronting a problem may require you to re-think your assumptions about the other person. If you have been reluctant to speak with them, it may have been because you believe them to be weak, or arrogant, or stubborn, or mean. Taking responsibility for confronting them means that you need to put those assumptions aside. You must at least believe that the other person is reasonable and willing to listen to your side of the story. You must give up the idea that there must be someone to blame. If the problem is solved and the relationship improves, you cannot continue to complain about it, etc.
People also have fears about the outcome of such conversations. The team at the chemical processing plant worried that their managers would be angry and take it out on them. They could end up worse off then they were before. There could be hard feelings. A relationship that worked fairly well on a superficial level could disintegrate altogether. They could be embarrassed, mocked, become the butt of jokes. People can be cruel. Their peers might call them “_____nosers” or worse (No lack of salty language at this facility). Certainly, all of these outcomes are possible.
It’s a little like the disclaimers on the prescription drugs you take. “This drug could cause: drowsiness, confusion, itching, frequent urination, horrible ugly sores, blindness, or death.” Well, who wouldn’t stop and think about it? But the fact is those are rare outcomes. The facilitator of the leadership training has the responsibility to acknowledge these risks. But, when conducted carefully using the skills learned in the leadership training, the risks are minimized. Anything worth having involves at least some risk.
Every encounter, while involving risk, is also an opportunity. It is an opportunity to make a connection that may be important to you, the team, your family, or your company. Even if the stakes are not as high as the Challenger example, or the incidents in the experiments, or the crime in New York, every time you encounter another human being, you have the chance to make a difference, no matter how slight. These things add up.