Things I Never Told My Parents

by Selena Cruz George, P.E.T. Program Manager

As tradition calls for in the second week of July, I visited the ranch and spent a blazing hot weekend kicking back by the pool while the dogs chased chickens, the horses grazed and my dad manned the grill. The more family members who come, the more we start story-telling, laughing and reminiscing. We may have broken a record for our family this year!

Likely being the most opposite of the rest of the bunch, the conversation usually ends up coming ’round to me a few times. What am I doing with my life, am I still dating that strange character from last year and oh, remember when Selena almost did that ONE STUPID THING?!

When it came time for that last subject, I responded differently than I normally would. Instead of shrugging and laughing with them, I admitted a few things that they never really knew the truth about.

Yes, it was me who toilet-papered the neighbor’s house when I was 14.

And yep, I was the one who had the epic party of junior year in high school.

Oh and also, I know I said that my best friend made me sneak out of the house with her that one night to see the concert…but it was really my idea!

I’m old enough now where (thankfully), everyone got a pretty good laugh out of it (phew!) even though I still was a bit nervous to fess up to my parents, strangely enough.

I couldn’t help but wonder why I did the things I did, and why was I so afraid to tell them when I was young? Was I a bad kid? Did I lead my life down the wrong path, destined for failure? Of course not! In fact, I think I’m pretty uhh…”normal.”

Like most teenagers, I simply got to realize that I didn’t need my parents as much as I used to. As Dr. Gordon says: “Teenagers don’t rebel against their parents; they rebel against their parents’ power.” I couldn’t have said it better myself.

And along with my “bad behavior” came punishment of all sorts. Restriction, time-outs, you name it. Did these punishments stop me from doing the things that my parents didn’t want me to do? Of course not! I simply became more clever. (Sorry mom and dad.)

It’s not that I didn’t love and respect my parents – I did, and do! I suppose it was just that my need for freedom became much too strong because of the severe limits, punishments and fear that was created in my relationship with them. If only they knew about P.E.T….sigh….

My final thought here is this (as previously posted on our P.E.T. Fanpage): “What punishment teaches is how to avoid punishment.” Think about it!

For questions, comments or compliments, please email us at family@gordontraining.com or phone us at: 800.628.1197