(Part II in a series of Blogs written by P.E.T. kids)
Blog post by: Ms. Virag S. – Budapest, Hungary
It’s quite difficult to write about why it is different, better to be a P.E.T. kid, because everything that might be different to other parenting modes is natural for me. But I’ll try.
I’m 25 now, and I was raised by my two awesome parents. They didn’t divorce, that is one of the most different thing to all my friends’ families. Most of their parents are divorced. My parents made it so far for 32 years. The other thing is that they’ve always talked to us (me and my brother), asked my opinion, my reasons for that. And they listened and considered every single thing I did or said. While I could see how my friends are treated at home: they did what they had to, and they lied about what they weren’t supposed to do. I’ve never been hit or locked up at home. My parents were always honest with me. This made me trust them like no one else.
As I look back now, I had an amazing childhood, and I can only remember how much I loved everything we did and what happened to us. For example, I really wanted a little brother or sister. Then it turned out I will have one, when I was 8-9 years old. Then my friends, who already had younger brothers told me, that that’s the worst thing ever, that my parents will forget me and they will only take care about the new one, and so on. I really got afraid. So I asked my parents, if they will do so. Of course, they understood me, because I was their only child for 9 years, but they promised me they would never do so. And they didn’t. I live in my own flat already, have my own life, and they still care for me as much as for my brother. I can count on them, tell them everything. I don’t see it in my friends’ families. They usually hide things from their parents, they get fed up with them, they fight about quite stupid things… I hate fighting.
Of course, I had my time as a teenager, I had to grow up sometime, but as I think back, I was always treated like an adult. Even when I wasn’t really behaving like one… And sometimes I fought with them, but they didn’t fight back. Now I think that is amazing, having such self-control and patience. I want to be a master of patience, just like my mom.
So altogether, I think those things made me to be the person I am today. I like my life, I’m satisfied with what I’ve reached so far. At the age of 22 I was brave enough to move abroad totally alone, to study in another country, and I succeeded. Then I came home, have my life, my job, and I love it. I feel quite confident about myself, and compared to my friends, who have the same cultural or financial background as me, but were subject of different parenting, I usually feel they still haven’t grown up. They aren’t independent at all. They can’t make that one big step to become an adult, to let their parents live their lives, which I think is very important in our lives.
So these are my messy thoughts about how I feel about the way I was raised. It is not everything, just what came to my mind. But I hope you get the feeling. 😉