Leadership Training Blog

Pokémon Go: It’s Awesome! It’s Stupid! It’s…Causing Conflicts

Date: July 19th, 2016

Blog post by:  Marie Bryson

She: “Put your phone away right. Now.

He: “Are you kidding me? There’s a PokeStop with a lure at the Gap!”

She: “I swear to God, we are leaving if you keep this up.”

He: “Why? It takes five seconds to collect things at a stop and, like, another ten seconds tops to catch a Pokémon, and I can do that while you’re looking at skirts or something. That’s boring for me, too.”

She: “Auuuuuuuuuuuuughhhhhhhhhhh!”

Did you think that was a dialogue between a mother and son? Nah. It was two grown adults who appeared to be in their thirties, walking through a lovely outdoor outlet mall on a sunny day.

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The Four Stages of Learning: They’re a Circle, Not a Straight Line

Date: July 7th, 2016

Blog Post by: Marie Bryson

Summer is upon us, and along with the sun and pool time and vacation time come multiple opportunities to conveniently forget things we’ve already learned. Take, for instance, a trip to the fair.

Here in San Diego, the county fair is notorious for introducing new and unique foods each year—most of them ingenious ways (or disgusting ones, depending on how you look at it) to consume a full day’s allotment of sugar, fat, and calories in one sitting.

In 2016, just a few of the newcomers were:

  • French Toast Bacon Bombs
  • Lasagna Sandwiches
  • Deep-Fried Cookie Butter
  • Deep-Fried Pizza
  • Bacon-Wrapped Baked Potatoes
  • Grilled Cheese Waffles & Chicken

What, exactly, does this have to do with learning? Come, traipse with me through a wonderland of cotton candy, hot pretzels, fried lemonade (yes), chocolate-covered bacon, Krispy Kreme chicken sandwiches, and deep-fried nachos. Let’s learn.

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On Millennials, Conversation, and Listening Skills

Date: June 21st, 2016

By: Marie Bryson

I received from my Mother, recently, via a seemingly endless string of Forwards (as one does), an email with the Subject line “The Death of Conversation.” It was a more or less inoffensive collection of one-panel cartoons generally harrumphing about These Kids Today and Their Cellphones These Days, with the predictable overarching theme that nobody talks to each other anymore because welp they’ve just got their faces buried in their phones—which is kind of hilarious, really, since Mom texts me from her own phone on the regular, and now that she’s gone and picked up an iPad? Yeah. That too. (I didn’t reply. Didn’t want her to trip and fall down in the middle of the street when she picked up her mail. On her phone.)

So, about this tendency some of us (old enough to remember when M*A*S*H was still on TV in its first run) have to get grumbly about these kids today and being constantly glued to their devices, man

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Powerful Words on Power from a Non-Power Person

Date: June 7th, 2016

By: Dr. Thomas Gordon, Three-time Nobel Peace Prize Nominee and founder of Gordon Training

I have been asked many times about the source of power, where does it come from? Occasionally the people who ask are hoping there’s some previously unknown or hidden source of power they can use to start winning fights they’ve been losing. But belief in a secret source of power is somewhat like Ponce de Leon’s belief in a fountain of youth. It doesn’t exist.

So I tell them: power comes from the ability to reward and/or punish. Put another way, power is the ability to create pain and/or pleasure. Users of power manipulate rewards and punishments to get what they want and if the pain is great enough or the rewards desirable enough they get compliance.

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Facebook and Twitter Are Trying To Kill My Empathy…and Burn the Body

Date: May 23rd, 2016

By:  Marie Bryson


Never read the comments.

That’s a sanity-saving rule for All Things Internet. It’s served me well for at least twenty years. Generally, I follow it, because, well, ugh, comments are the id’s off-leash dog park. Sometimes, when I’m feeling masochistic, I don’t.

leader effectiveness training masochistic at work

Which leads me to today’s reflection. I was re-reading Leader Effectiveness Training the other day and ran across a singular, simple sentence that made me stop short and then go pour myself a strong drink.

Wait, what? How could such a positive book send me to the liquor cabinet with the tallest glass in my condo, full to the brim with ice?

It was this:

“Rather conclusive evidence emerged that at least two ingredients are necessary in any relationship of one person fostering growth and psychological health in another—empathy and acceptance.” (L.E.T., Dr. Thomas Gordon, p. 64)

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So, Who Owns The Problem Now?

Date: May 10th, 2016

By: Dr. Bill Stinnett

I just sent my I-Message. The “other” is looking a little defensive. Where are we in the Behavior Window? This question often comes up during Leader Effectiveness Training workshops. Did I just give my problem to the other? Or, is there a new problem?

leadership leader training problems at workLet’s use an example to clarify. I have a work colleague whom I trust and respect, Sylvia. She is a great co-worker, smart, hard-working, cooperative, helpful. All that stuff you hope for in a team member. Lately, however, she has been driving me crazy. I will send her an e-mail with three questions.

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Yet Brittany Leads

Date: April 26th, 2016

By: Sheryl Wilde

brittany leadership cerebral palsy“If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.”  ~ John Quincy Adams

She has the use of only one hand
Permanently disfigured,
Fingers frozen, crooked

Yet Brittany leads

She is cortically blind
Seeing nothing but dim colors
And shadowy shapes

Yet Brittany leads

She must be lifted
From her bed to her wheelchair
And back again
Every morning and every night

Yet Brittany leads

She cannot brush her teeth
Or use the bathroom
Or even shower on her own

Yet Brittany leads

She is confined to a wheelchair
Held upright by a harness
Her disease-ravaged spine
Too weak to support her

Yet Brittany leads

I was there to interview her about a leadership award she’d recently won. And I must admit I was a little nervous. I hadn’t been around many disabled people before and I didn’t want to do or say the wrong thing.

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Why Can’t I Just Learn Better Communication Skills through Online Modules?

Date: April 12th, 2016

By:  Marie Bryson

It’s a common and even understandable question and not an unreasonable one: So much training and education is done online these days instead of in classrooms, why can’t conflict resolution and communication skills be taught the same way? Why should organizations have to spend the time and resources on coordinating schedules, travel and on-site instruction?

Fair questions, those, and they’ve got honest, realistic answers. But first, a quick trip down memory lane.

How to Crash and Burn When Learning a New Skill: A Case Study

leadership trainingBack in the 1980s, when women’s bangs were big and shoulder-pads were bigger, I found a Yoga videotape (if you’re under the age of 30, these were sad things that produced video roughly the quality of watching a DVD underwater from the other end of a swimming pool). It was on sale! For $10! Even I, a poor High School student, could afford that! So I picked it up. Because who doesn’t want to become long and lean and strong and metamorphose into a supermodel-actress, amirite?

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What to Do When Rules Are Broken

Date: March 14th, 2016

By: Dr. Thomas Gordon

Every organization has rules, and leaders at every level are held accountable for making certain that their people follow them. Some of these rules were in effect long before group members joined the organization; some may have been set by higher authority and hence lie outside “the area of freedom” of leaders at lower levels. Many such rules, obviously, get established without the participation of the people who are expected to abide by them.

leaders rule breaking leadership trainingWhat is a leader to do when a member of her work group breaks one of these rules? Is there a way to handle such infractions and still operate within the no-lose philosophy?

Here, in outline form, is a step-by-step procedure to use. Suppose one of your group members, Pat, has broken a rule:

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What to Do When Your Needs Are Being Blocked by Your Leader

Date: February 23rd, 2016

By: Dr. Thomas Gordon

conflict between boss employee at workLeaders, no less than group members, find themselves unable to get their needs met because of some action by their boss. Without consulting you, your boss makes a decision that interferes with your doing your best job or deprives you of something you need. Now what do you do? Or your boss settles a conflict between the two of you by using Method I, causing you to feel she won, you lost. Must that be the end of it? Must you be resolved to grin and bear it? Unfortunately, many leaders do grin and bear it, although their grin is usually a cover-up for resentment and anger.

Yet, doing nothing when your leader has made a decision unfavorable and unacceptable to you is sanctioned and supported by commonly accepted “principles of management,” such as

“An order is an order.”

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How to Handle Complaints From Lower Levels

Date: February 9th, 2016

By: Dr. Thomas Gordon

resolving conflict complaints at work with leadership trainingA common problem for all leaders is what to do when a member of one of your team’s group comes to you with a complaint arising from some unmet need. Typically, when a person makes such an appeal to her boss’s boss, it is called “going over your boss’s head.” This is almost universally condemned as reprehensible. Discussions about this problem in our L.E.T. classes always produce the strongest of feelings from participants:

“That’s insubordination!”

“It should be strongly discouraged.”

“Going over your boss’s head is asking for  trouble.”

“I’d fire anyone who went over my head.”

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Do You Know What Every Leader Should Know?

Date: January 12th, 2016

By:  Dr. Thomas Gordon

leadership training positions at workLiz Carter was appointed operations supervisor at her bank.  At about the same time, Wayne Howard was elected president of his service club. Andrea Martin finally achieved her lifelong ambition of becoming vice-president of sales at her company.  After six years as a first-line supervisor in a manufacturing company, Eric Morrison was moved up to plant manager.  Anna Vitale was voted student body president at her university.

Their friends congratulated them and told them how much they deserved the new position.  One phoned her husband and excitedly announced the good news.  Another took his family out for dinner to celebrate.  All felt proud of what they had achieved.  Secretly, they all felt they had “arrived”, “made it up the ladder, “got to the top.”

These are the universal reactions of people who get appointed to position of leadership.  They feel, “I’ve made it.”

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How Do the Leader Effectiveness Training Skills Help You to Be More Effective in Your Job?

Date: January 6th, 2016

By:  Jorge Bonifaz

Esterline Mexico How to be a better leader - leadership training skills

Jorge Bonifaz of Esterline Technologies (Tijuana, BC, Mexico) shares his insights, via a short video on leadership training shown here, into how L.E.T. can help you be a better leader (and better team member).  He sees the benefits of learning better listening skills and conflict resolution skills to help people maximize their productive work time.  And you can check out the video in English and/or in Spanish!

English:  https://youtu.be/IzgnPWKTxNY

Spanish:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UmhHyjgrcxM&feature=youtu.be


Be a part of the conversation!
Share your comments on:

 L.E.T. on Facebook

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 L.E.T. on LinkedIn

Or if you would like to contact us about this posting, please email or call us at:
800-628-1197 ext. 308


Do You Have Managers Who Lack People Skills?

Date: December 15th, 2015

By:  Steve Crandall, L.E.T. Master Trainer

Raise your hand if you or someone you know has been promoted due to job expertise but lack the people skills to make managing more effective? What is often overlooked (which creates frustration for both the manager, the people who report to them and their boss) is equipping the manager with the skills to listen, confront and actually manage people.  Lack of leadership skills is often the downfall of a newly promoted manager.  Leader Effectiveness Training can remedy this situation.  Steve Crandall, L.E.T. Master Trainer for Gordon Training International since 1983, speaks about how the L.E.T. program gives new managers a whole set of listening skills to better understand the needs of their people and the organization.  It provides a set of assertive skills that allows the manager to express their needs and be able to have others understand the manager’s challenges.  Additionally, L.E.T. teaches conflict resolution and values collision skills that help them prevent and reduce conflicts between all levels that they interact with.

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How Leader Effectiveness Training Can Help Lean Work Even Better

Date: December 7th, 2015

By:  Gary LaPerle

Lean” is a great system for impacting continuous improvement but it needs the tools required for the people issues…and that’s where Gary’s leadership training (via Leader Effectiveness Training) comes in.  He shares his insights into how any “Lean” program can be improved with the powerful skills of L.E.T.



Be a part of the conversation!
Share your comments on:

 L.E.T. on Facebook

 L.E.T. on Twitter

 L.E.T. on LinkedIn

Or if you would like to contact us about this posting, please email or call us at:
800-628-1197 ext. 308


Why Dr. Thomas Gordon’s “Leader Effectiveness Training” is Classroom-based

Date: November 9th, 2015

Blog post by: Linda Adams

The question about whether L.E.T. (or any type of leadership training) can be taught online has come up from time to time and with the advances in technology, even more so recently.  Of course, it’s true that many workshops can be effectively offered online, especially when they include mostly didactic material.  Some universities are now offering entire degrees online.

Because it’s sometimes difficult to find a L.E.T. Workshop in a certain area or on a certain date or a company has employees who need L.E.T. but aren’t all working in the same state or country, the idea of teaching/participating in a workshop online can sound like a good alternative.

We don’t want to insist on the traditional classroom training format simply because that’s the way we’ve always done it.  As a result, we’ve taken a hard look at what could be gained or lost by having L.E.T. offered online and have identified the reasons for maintaining our existing delivery system.

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How Leader Effectiveness Training Can Help Lean Work Even Better

Date: October 27th, 2015

Lean” is a great system for impacting continuous improvement but it needs the tools required for the people issues…and that’s where Gary’s leadership training (via Leader Effectiveness Training) comes in.  He shares his insights into how any “Lean” program can be improved with the powerful skills of L.E.T.

Lean toyota management and LET leadership training leaders conflict resolution skills at work corporate



Be a part of the conversation!
Share your comments on:

 L.E.T. on Facebook

 L.E.T. on Twitter

 L.E.T. on LinkedIn

Or if you would like to contact us about this posting, please email or call us at:
800-628-1197 ext. 308


Helpful Stuff to Improve Your Leadership Skills

Date: October 13th, 2015

Blog posted by:  Michelle Adams

Every week we post new Blogs about leadership on our website and there’s so much good stuff there that we wanted to make it easy for you to see what we have—hopefully there are some Blogs that you will find useful and interesting—and will aid you in your journey to be the best leader (or manager or team member) you can be.

We’ve listed just a few of them for you below. Should you wish to, you can browse this page to see ALL the many Blogs, videos and articles we’ve been posting)…or you can email me and request to be added to my Blog group where I send out a link to a new Blog 2-3 times a month.

leadership training psychology conflict resolution skills corporate communication


Do You Use Power to Resolve Your Conflicts?

Ever Wish You Could Change Someone’s Values?

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Do You Use Power to Resolve Your Conflicts?

Date: September 15th, 2015

Blog posted by:  Michelle Adams

There are different methods of conflict resolution as I am sure you’re aware. Some are based on using power, some are not. After reading this, which type of conflict resolution would you/do you prefer?

Here are the Power-Based Methods (using terminology created by Dr. Thomas Gordon – Method I, Method II and Method III):

• Method I – You Win and Other Loses

This problem solving approach is based on the use of power to impose a solution on another. The person using Method I essentially says: “I have the power in our relationship in the form of rewards (++) and punishments (- -) so I will win, even if you must lose.”

The person with less power generally takes this position: “I must accept your solution, but I resent your using power on me and I’ll find some way of getting back at you the first chance I get.”

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What’s the Weather Like Where You Work?

Date: September 8th, 2015

Blog posted by:  Michelle Adams

The “climate” of a relationship or of a group is a critical factor in whether the No-Lose Method will first be accepted and secondly be successful. Climate usually refers to the prevailing attitudes, beliefs and behaviors of relationships.

  • Do the parties in a relationship or the members of their working group trust each other?
  • Do they recognize mutually held interests?
  • Do they usually feel it is safe to speak openly and honestly—to be assertive?
  • Do they feel their relationship or group functions cooperatively or competitively?
  • Do they feel it is safe to strongly support their positions?

Do they understand the importance of both parties getting their needs met?
The parties should believe that the goal of dealing with conflict is not merely to resolve the conflict but rather it is to find the most creative and fairest resolution that leaves neither party feeling that the other has come out with an unfair advantage.

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